JC Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 A bloody great big blue bottle fly that won't go anywhere near any open window upstairs!! > > Air rifle, test your skills! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richo Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 The number of wrapped round haylage bales still waiting to be stacked, got there eventually. Yesterday morning there were nearly 600 finished by this evening. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 tourists complaining about the local contractor dropping muck out of the rear of there k2's at torcross, whats up with these people Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deere-est Posted September 13, 2006 Author Share Posted September 13, 2006 Air rifle, test your skills! It would be too tempting to shoot that damn yappy scrappy terrier next door mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IH885XLMAN Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 tourists complaining about the local contractor dropping muck out of the rear of there k2's at torcross, whats up with these people tell them politely to "f~~k of back to their concrete jungle" present company accepted Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 was expecting complaints about the smell to from them, they looked very anoyed at the little drop of heaps as they went by, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CCF Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 It's me.... I know it is :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( Well to you :'( :'( :'( :'( Suprisingly it's not you this time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Ferguson Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 A bloody great big blue bottle fly that won't go anywhere near any open window upstairs!! > > Suprisingly it's not you this time I was going to say Phew that's a relief... but for those final two words :'( :'( Tris... use a rubber band.... it's great fun.. .wait until they sit still and WACK.. let them have it... Back in the late 80's I worked for a big company in Cambridge as an operations manager (take a seat... this story may take some time) (you will let me know if I am boring you all won't you)... anyway... I was given my "own office" ... which given my "new status" within the company was the poxyest one they had.... turns out that just under my window were the large wheelie bins used by the warehouse for all sorts of food waste (it as a cheese company).. anyway... in the summer it got so hot in my little office that I just HAD to have the window open... EVERY bloody blue bottle and flying creepy thing would hang around the bins.. and eventually end up in my office... so..... I got the girl who ordered the stationary to order me a bumper sized box of rubber bands.... I worked out that when they sat still you could hit them and splat them into many pieces... being the quick thinking fella I was (back then... the old mind has gone now)... I decided to get the afore mentioned secretary to order me a HOOOOOOOGE shiny wipe on wipe off graph that covered the whole of one wall in my office... with a dry wipe pen each day I would keep a graph of how many files I had zapped with my magic bands.... anyway,.... the MD was a REAL ***** (Hope he doesn;t read this... I still see him occasionally and I'm always polite to him )... he come in my office one day... and catches me on the hop... the conversion goes like this.. Morning Mark Morning Peter Tell me... what's this graph I see on the wall then - I've been looking at it recently... I see it's shot up recently Ah... er... well... it't my ..... er..... (then it come to me)... it's my pounds sales v miles distance ratio graph Peter... it's a study I;m doing into the ongoing viability of cretain aspects of our vansales distribution fleet v our telesales operations... (totally made it up on the spot - impressive or what ) From that day onwards... he would come in and say good morning Mark... I see the graph is looking good still... "Oh yes Peter" "tell me something Mark... is it good when it's going high or is it bad ??? " "Oh it's good Peter... but very very complex to explain I am afraid to say - you'll just have to trust me on this one " As soon as the cold weather came I would wipe it all off and pin up some posters of cheese ;D Hey... you lot... you still awake ??? Where is everybody Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ihatepoundland Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Haha great story, did the cheese images cause the MD confusion? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Ferguson Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Haha great story, did the cheese images cause the MD confusion? Most things caused him confusion... like I said... he was a bit of a winkle (still is probably) :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THEBRITFARMER Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Oh did someone say something Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CCF Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 I was going to say Phew that's a relief... but for those final two words :'( :'( Tris... use a rubber band.... it's great fun.. .wait until they sit still and WACK.. let them have it... Back in the late 80's I worked for a big company in Cambridge as an operations manager (take a seat... this story may take some time) (you will let me know if I am boring you all won't you)... anyway... I was given my "own office" ... which given my "new status" within the company was the poxyest one they had.... turns out that just under my window were the large wheelie bins used by the warehouse for all sorts of food waste (it as a cheese company).. anyway... in the summer it got so hot in my little office that I just HAD to have the window open... EVERY bloody blue bottle and flying creepy thing would hang around the bins.. and eventually end up in my office... so..... I got the girl who ordered the stationary to order me a bumper sized box of rubber bands.... I worked out that when they sat still you could hit them and splat them into many pieces... being the quick thinking fella I was (back then... the old mind has gone now)... I decided to get the afore mentioned secretary to order me a HOOOOOOOGE shiny wipe on wipe off graph that covered the whole of one wall in my office... with a dry wipe pen each day I would keep a graph of how many files I had zapped with my magic bands.... anyway,.... the MD was a REAL ***** (Hope he doesn;t read this... I still see him occasionally and I'm always polite to him )... he come in my office one day... and catches me on the hop... the conversion goes like this.. Morning Mark Morning Peter Tell me... what's this graph I see on the wall then - I've been looking at it recently... I see it's shot up recently Ah... er... well... it't my ..... er..... (then it come to me)... it's my pounds sales v miles distance ratio graph Peter... it's a study I;m doing into the ongoing viability of cretain aspects of our vansales distribution fleet v our telesales operations... (totally made it up on the spot - impressive or what ) From that day onwards... he would come in and say good morning Mark... I see the graph is looking good still... "Oh yes Peter" "tell me something Mark... is it good when it's going high or is it bad ??? " "Oh it's good Peter... but very very complex to explain I am afraid to say - you'll just have to trust me on this one " As soon as the cold weather came I would wipe it all off and pin up some posters of cheese ;D Hey... you lot... you still awake ??? Where is everybody ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Ferguson Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Oh did someone say something :D :D :D - sorry fella's shall I delete it :'( :'( :'( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CCF Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 :D :D :D - sorry fella's shall I delete it :'( :'( :'( Get me a pillow first! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THEBRITFARMER Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 :D :D :D - sorry fella's shall I delete it :'( :'( :'( It was actually a funny story Marky. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FB Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 It was actually a funny story Marky. is that one of his longest posts :D \ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Ferguson Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 is that one of his longest posts :D \ It's 100% true as well... honest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IH885XLMAN Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 Ive just missed out on a international luxury cabs leaflet that i fogot to bid on > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ihatepoundland Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 If it didn't sell, send them an email, never know Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deere-est Posted September 14, 2006 Author Share Posted September 14, 2006 What time is it ??? ??? Blimey, I must have nodded off for a minute.. .. . .or 14 hours!!!!!!!!! Great story Marky, it's wet out today so I will practice on the daddy longlegs!!! :D :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 a parcel turning up today which i had paid ?3.60 for first class of a ebay seller, only to find the cheaky sod sent it second class at ?1.39 how bloody anoying Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IH885XLMAN Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 If it didn't sell, send them an email, never know did hes posted it off today Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Light Land Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 boss driving a tractor all day with the oil level on ?dd?even after i told him in the morning to add donk oil because it?s out of oil. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deere-est Posted September 15, 2006 Author Share Posted September 15, 2006 Burn't me finger tip on the iron, it bloody hurts when I pick my nose now Bloody womans work anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Udimore Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 My accountants contract selling Udimore Tractor Shop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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