Tractorman810 Posted January 16, 2013 Share Posted January 16, 2013 even jeremy kyle is getting into the act Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jdeere6910 Posted January 16, 2013 Share Posted January 16, 2013 I see tesco have introduced a new kids meal in their cafe's containing my little pony. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdc Posted January 16, 2013 Share Posted January 16, 2013 Traces of uniquorn found in veggieburgers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WillTEF20 Posted January 16, 2013 Share Posted January 16, 2013 I guess those burgers won't be trotting off the shelves anymore! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted January 17, 2013 Share Posted January 17, 2013 The government guidelines for road travel in the snow, suggest that you carry thermal clothing, a blanket, a thermos, a hazard warning triangle, a snow shovel, grit, a flashlight, extra batteries and enough food and drink to last for 24 hours. hell didn't I look a Pratt on the bus this morning Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
david_scrivener Posted January 17, 2013 Share Posted January 17, 2013 I see tesco have introduced a new kids meal in their cafe's containing my little pony. you heard wrong, it's one of their competitors, and the actual product name is My LIDL Pony Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BC Posted January 18, 2013 Share Posted January 18, 2013 Tesco selling horse meat! Whatever next... my Lidl pony?? I ate all the Tesco burgers I had in the fridge. I was so hungry I just hoofed em down !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerrabbit Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 What do you put on your burgers? £4 each way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdc Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 Well I know it's been done to death, but I ate my last Tesco burger from the freezer tonight - still got a bit between my teeth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerrabbit Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 You all have to buy Scottish burgers now, there's nay horse meat in them! Have you seen the superstore 'prank' with the pantomime horse? It's on YouTube. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevestoys Posted January 26, 2013 Share Posted January 26, 2013 A man, getting along in years, finds that he is unable to perform sexually. He goes to his doctor who tries a few things, but nothing seems to work. Finally, as a last hope, the doctor refers him to an African medicine man. The medicine man says, 'I can cure this.' With that said, he throws a white powder into a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke. Then he says, 'This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year. All you have to do is say '123,' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!' The man then asks, 'What happens when it's over, and I don't want to continue?' The medicine man replies, 'When your partner can take no more sex and is completely raddled, all she has to say is '1234', and it will then go down. But be warned, the pork sword will not rise again for another year..' The old gent rushes home, anxious to try out his new powers. That night he showers, shaves and smothers himself in aftershave. He slides into bed, cuddles up to his wife, says '123' and suddenly he has the most gigantic stiffie ever, just as the medicine man promised. His wife turns over and asks, 'What did you say '123' for?!' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Tractor Twitcher Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Tesco's prototype tractor under going trials............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barry Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Egg- cellent ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerrabbit Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 ...................And Tractorman wrote................................'And carry enough food for 24 hours'........... Would look a bit strange everyone carrying a horse in the back seat Sean! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted February 8, 2013 Share Posted February 8, 2013 doesnt take long does it ,the second one will even throw in a bag of your choice, there you go bill :laugh: http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Findus-Crispy-Pancakes-/230926155072?pt=UK_Antiques_Other_RL&hash=item35c4457d40 http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/FINDUS-91-CRISPY-BEEF-PANCAKES-VERY-RARE-AS-THEY-CONTAIN-BEEF-/200892271189?pt=UK_Antiquities&hash=item2ec61cca55 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Deere Collector Posted February 8, 2013 Share Posted February 8, 2013 doesnt take long does it ,the second one will even throw in a bag of your choice, there you go bill :laugh: http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Findus-Crispy-Pancakes-/230926155072?pt=UK_Antiques_Other_RL&hash=item35c4457d40 http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/FINDUS-91-CRISPY-BEEF-PANCAKES-VERY-RARE-AS-THEY-CONTAIN-BEEF-/200892271189?pt=UK_Antiquities&hash=item2ec61cca55 Is this just Horse play? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 :laugh: they wouldn't ?? would they Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HS. Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Mmmmmmmmmmmmnh tastes like... Chicken? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BC Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 An Arab Sheik was admitted to Hospital for heart surgery, but prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to store blood in case the need arises. As the gentleman had a rare type of blood, it couldn't be found locally, so, the call went out. Finally a Scotsman was located who had a similar blood type. The Scot willingly donated his blood for the Arab. After the surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman as appreciation for giving his blood, a new BMW, diamonds & US dollars. A couple of days later, once again, the Arab had to go back“under the knife†for corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the Scotsman who was more than happy to donate his blood again After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman a thank-you card & a box of Quality Street chocolates. The Scotsman was shocked that the Arab did not reciprocate his kind gesture as he had anticipated. He phoned the Arab & asked him: "I thought you would be generous again and that you would give me a BMW, diamonds & money... but you only gave me a thank-you card & a box of Quality Street." To this the Arab replied: "Aye laddie, but I now have Scottish blood in ma veins". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbo Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 Roses are Red Apples are fruity Watch your Lasagne It may be Black Beauty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerrabbit Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 I had a lasagne for supper last night, thought it was a bit dry going down, woke up this morning a bit hoarse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
david_scrivener Posted February 16, 2013 Share Posted February 16, 2013 Cartoon in today's Daily Telegraph: Teacher to pupil, "If you don't do your homework, it's double school lunch for you." In other news, I've seen the same few jokes about the Oscar Pistorius story lots of times: He hasn't got a leg to stand on. They had been drinking, and he was legless. Anyone seen any better? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
powerrabbit Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Not a joke but carrying on the latest theme, went to the local car boot sale this morning and there was a chap there selling 'farm fresh meat' from his little stall, I asked him for a haunch of horse, he smiled and said 'sorry, sold the last one ten minutes ago'. We had a good old yarn and a chuckle about these recent revalations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractorman810 Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 David Cameron has said that Britain is prepared for nuclear attacks from North Korea. Intresting david seeing as we weren't even prepared for snow in winter... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
david_scrivener Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 I've just seen this on the Sickipedia website (one of the few there I could repeat here): I've just heard about Sir Alex Ferguson retiring..... How unusual to read a news story about a man in his seventies that doesn't involve child abuse, sexual assault, and the like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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